Get manlier friends

When I moved out of state to work a job in manufacturing I learned how freeing it was to actually spend time around mostly men. After work I would put in work on Tinder, meet ladies, and “close deals” but the earlier half of my day was just a bunch of guys shooting the shit. And it was great for me. Why? Well let’s see

1. You’re not afraid to be yourself
Even if most guys don’t dig what you do as a person, they’ll be more likely to tell you and the level of fakeness is reduced when around groups of most men. Catty behavior is near zero (or absent altogether) and you’re pretty much free to express yourself the way you would if women weren’t around. AKA your true form. What this means is that when you ARE around women, this real self will come out more. Women will appreciate it as well. If they don’t appreciate, you will learn not to care.

2. They’ll encourage you to be more masculine
Men check each other way more than women do. Women don’t tell each other to improve. They usually just sit around and convince themselves they’re right and everyone else needs to be better. Men call each other out on their shit more often. I don’t have to explain further why this is good for personal growth. If you’re always told you’re right, you’re not.

3. They roughhouse
Groups of guys will punch each other, body slam each other, and just spar more. This means you have to keep in better physical shape so you don’t look like a bitch in front of your boys. It also makes you more aggressive as a person. If you feel you’re lacking in this department you probably need more male friends.

4. They can actually talk about important shit
Women talk about gossipy bullshit, celebrities, and other useless shit that we as men generally couldn’t give two shits about. If you’re around other men, the topics can literally be anything. It’s more mentally stimulating and you don’t feel like you want to kill yourself hearing about trivial bullshit. Men generally also don’t spend most of their day complaining unless it’s actual life shit. Women get on their soapbox about random people they don’t like.

5. Your T-levels will go up
Being around more testosterone means your levels will increase as well. It’s no wonder that men who spend most of their day around women start to act more like women. The problem with this is that it helps no one.

6. You engage in manlier activities
Hang around women all day and what will happen? You probably start to care about celebrity gossip. You probably become afraid of confrontation. You probably become more timid. Hang around guys all the time and what happens? You hunt. You fish. You fight. You shoot guns. You play sports. You learn some new shit. You talk politics. You make shit happen. Even if you do none of these things, the above 5 things will make you more masculine.

7. You appreciate life more
Men being men is what our life is about. When we’re around each other we learn to take it on the chin more. We become more resilient. We see the bigger picture. When we spend time around women we become petty, we become aggravated by the littlest shit, and we forget our mission in life.

Hopefully these reasons above have helped you see why a man shouldn’t waste his time hanging around women and should seek to make more friends with other men. It will only help you improve more.

Desk jobs were not designed for manly men

I know if you are reading this you may actually work a desk job. Keep in mind I mean no disrespect and want you to be successful in your financial endeavors and taking care of your family. Hell, I write this post because I used to work desk jobs too.

I can tell you that the corporate structure of a cushy desk job is tantamount to killing a man’s essence. I can’t explain it. But it’s almost as if there is a yearning to…I don’t know…get the fuck up and not be confined to a space like an animal.

But aside from that, I feel desk jobs just kill men because of office politics. Men have to learn to be subservient in such ways that slowly but surely kill our spirit. You’ve seen Office Space. Remember Milton? I am sure we all rooted for him but that’s because we don’t actually want to be in his place.

The other aspect of office work is the catty female aspect. Let’s be honest. Nobody actually wants to work with women. Even other women. Too much estrogen leads to an irrational and emotional environment where productivity takes a backseat and feelings get to the forefront of anything. And imagine having a female boss in this environment.

Men being in a place where we essentially have to tone down our masculine nature, succumb to the irrational desires of corporate politics and catty female nature is no place to cultivate ourselves. I know some of us have office jobs until something gets better. I have been there before. Just know this: if your office job is killing your spirit I recommend you get out and find something more masculine. I can’t tell you how much happier I was driving heavy machinery and lifting shit all day working with the boys than I was doing mindless computer work. I could also ACT NORMALLY as opposed to having to be PC and censor myself for fear of losing my job.

Manly professions always create healthier minds in men. Don’t let yourself succumb to the corporate nature and femininity of an office job. Get your hands dirty, learn a trade, and hang with men all day as opposed to slowly turning into a woman by letting emotions get to you, growing boobs, and becoming more passive. I guarantee your body and mind will thank you.

Why ignoring a woman is sometimes stupid

We all know of those strategies from the old PUA days where a guy was using the method of “pulling back” from a girl in order to generate more interest. Supposedly it was all to make sure he was intriguing and busy and all that other garbage. That may have worked in the days before smartphones but using such a tactic nowadays when it makes no sense is only going to hurt your chance. Don’t believe me? Think of the following situation:

Let’s say Ashley has many suitors on Tinder. Let’s call them Dave, Will, Tom, and Matt. Then multiply these 4 times 100 and you will get an idea of how many suitors Ashley has. So now let’s say you’re trying to get Ashley to go on a date with you. Do you think not responding to her messages or waiting to create a mysterious vibe will get her wanting more? Of course fucking not. Ashley wants a massive cock to plow her while her juice run down her leg and you need to be the one doing it. Why the fuck should Tom get there before you? Oh yeah because you thought it was necessary to ignore her.

Okay so let’s say you’re not doing that. Say you and Ashley went on the first date. You feel things went well enough to see her again. So what do you do? Do you wait like a fake cool guy because you don’t want to seem too thirsty? Ashley doesn’t know you from a hole in the wall (ha). Waiting only makes you seem like a guy who has no interest. Women still being the weaker sex won’t be getting in line trying to get you to text them or invite them out again. Despite feminism being so powerful, in essence all it has done is made it EASIER for more aggressive and masculine men to get what they want. Waiting and pretending to be aloof and disinterested is only going to hurt your chances.

If you know you’re into Ashley and whatever other basic White girl you want on your nuts, don’t be thinking pulling back early on will help you. Get her to see you again, and if she isn’t interested, waiting to make a move is only delaying you finding out she doesn’t give a shit about seeing you again. And if she is into you, you not moving fast means she will move on to Dave or whatever other cock is inching closer to her kitty. The truth is that in the days before smartphones and Tinder and online dating, you would have been the guy on her mind and waiting would have helped. Also, in the days before feminism and before there was shaming of slut shaming, Ashley would have been frowned upon for talking to more than one guy at a time. Now, Ashley has her pick of men that are willing to make the move. You need to adapt with the times. Also, Ashley’s biology makes her passive. You’re not doing yourself or her any favors by playing cool.

So what do I recommend? In the beginning just be aggressive. It takes a while to find a balance between showing her you want her and also implying you can get anyone else. Long story short this is more of an attitude you develop that shows to women as opposed to any sort of words that you say. It comes with practice and being passive isn’t going to lead you developing it. I am actually of the belief that men should actually start off aggressive and then learn to dial it back based on the situation and girl. All these gurus who try to sell you on specific step by step methods are well meaning but becoming a natural at understanding the opposite sex is mostly learned through adapting your own game to each experience and woman.

This means that in the beginning you should be aggressive in setting up the meetings. You should be trying to escalate. Worry about all that being aloof shit when she is actually into you. Then use it when you feel she needs to start longing more for you. She’s not gonna long for shit if she hasn’t met you or if she hasn’t slept with you. You can’t be teasing her kitty if her kitty has no experience with the work you do to make her happy. Men should provide a mix of being aggressive and pulling back but pulling back involves her wanting to gravitate to you. You can’t pull back from someone who has no interest in you. You need to generate that first. And in the beginning it’s not as if there is a social stigma with being aggressive. What I mean is it isn’t bad to tell her she should meet up with you or with you making moves. All that stuff is OK and even encouraged. Pull back if you find that you’ve been showing TOO much interest (i.e. being a simp) or hell even if she is starting to simp hard on you. Pulling back in those situations will help even more.

Say you’ve been dating a girl for a while. Say you’ve physically escalated and you know she’s into you. But say you want her into you a little more. Stop texting her for a few days. Get off social media. Just get busy. Take up a new hobby. Hell, it’s always good to just pull back from a relationship. Focus on you. But you shouldn’t be her everything. At that point, YES DO PULL BACK.

You should however NOT pull back when you haven’t laid any groundwork. If she hasn’t shown any indicators of interest or if they are weak at best you should escalate more until you’re sure that she is into you or not. Then your real work begins. Prior to that you should be showing her that you actually intend to escalate the interaction and not just be some weak beta orbiter. If you decide to pull back too early she will either a)lose interest if she already had it and go to Will/Dave/any other guy or b)she wasn’t that interested anyway and your leaving will only speed up the process of you having full irrelevance to her.

Contrast this with showing interest early. You face rejection early on (true) but in my opinion early rejection is the best rejection since it prevents you from becoming a simp later. After all, this is the worst place to be. And in the event you DON’T get rejected early then good things happen and you can employ the strategy LATER when it actually will be more likely to work.

Long story short: be aggressive early (aim for the yes or no), get her hooked if so, THEN pull back and reel her in even further.

Why lonely women are fascinated by cats

We all know the spinster stereotype. Crazy cat lady is part of it. We know that once women go past their wall, they either snatch some poor sap who will support their shit habits or they will be less lucky and live alone and unfulfilled. Sometimes they get a cat. Other times they get more.

Cats are known as being self-centered. Cats largely don’t care whether their owner lives or dies. Cats look out for number 1. Cats don’t follow a herd; they just do their thing and move on with life. In many ways, felines are the most “alpha” in attitude.

Now imagine if a woman had a man like this. She would go insane with trying to keep him. We see this all the time. Guys that act like cats tend to get the girl. They go off and chase the shiny object (other women), then they get bored and on the next one. They usually don’t give a shit about impressing a particular woman and just want their meal (sex). They give affection at their own whim. They don’t really worry about whether the girl loves them or not.

Compare these guys to men who act like puppy dogs. The woman is their master. She says “jump!” and they say “how high?”. They constantly seek validation and approval from her. They act all excited when she gives them a treat (sex), and they can’t go on without her at their side.

Now, I am sure as a guy you value the traits of a dog more than the traits of a cat. An honorable man loves loyalty. But does this actually help with women? The more a man acts like a puppy dog the more a woman pulls back. Of course “alpha” behavior is canine by definition (alpha dog) since dogs also have to lead in packs. But the point stands that guys who actually act like cats can make women crazy for them even if they’re not good at being leaders anywhere else.

The truth is, your leadership ability with women is honestly all that matters if you wish to spread your seed. How much money you make, your looks, your body fat level, all that shit matters but unless you make a woman feel like you can leave at any time AND you don’t care about her existence, she will take care of you as if you were her cat. She will reward you with food (sex), validation (showing you off to her friends), and companionship.

So this leads me to my point about lonely women. The cat essentially acts like a surrogate man for her. He ignores her. He teases her with affection. He looks cute. He makes her feel like she is needed and yet not too much to where she feels smothered. I have a feeling that women who chased bad boys in their youth are the same ones who hit the wall hard and settle down with cats as it subconsciously recreates the experience. Is this scientific? I don’t fucking care.

Anyway, if we want to avoid a generation of spinster cat women and our own frustration, we need to understand that it is traits of both dog and cat that will help us in our quest. We need to lead but at the same time we need to portray that we can be out the door at any minute if a woman’s behavior is not up to our standards. So be like a cat and start being a little more selfish and ready to walk out when need be. It will prevent your lady from becoming a spinster and replacing you with a feline version of what you couldn’t be.

Own your shit

One of the monumental lessons in being a guy is that you essentially have to be OK with the decisions you make. I don’t mean this in a “not learn from your mistakes” kind of way but also to understand WHY you did what you did at the time and to not regret it given the circumstances.

In other words, if there is an action you WANT to take because of how much you feel it is the right one at the moment, then as a man you need to TAKE that action.

Take interacting with women for example. How many times have you been sitting there next to a girl and then feeling like you want to say something but you can’t bring yourself to do it? Pretty annoying isn’t it? Nah fuck annoying. That shit EATS at you. You can’t take being “not able” to be you. But honestly why? Why do we always second guess ourselves?

Being raised by a single mother (God Bless her) means I didn’t have positive male role models to show me exactly how to “emote” as a man. Basically I learned behavior mostly from women. Well that’s all well and good if you’re gay or otherwise not into girls but if you’re a straight guy that feels the brunt of women ignoring you, having feminine emotions is a killer.

Part of owning your shit is what distinguishes us from women. Women need to be led and actually PREFER if a guy owns the decision for them as opposed to making it themselves. It’s as if women are looking at 1 million options and being confused. We as men aren’t hardwired to think that way, which is why it really hurts us more when we don’t make decisions.

If you look at it from a natural selection perspective, why would a physically weaker creature (a woman) look for a man who isn’t going to be sure of himself? A woman by nature isn’t sure of herself and needs guidance. Men who can’t provide guidance to even themselves are the least trustworthy. That’s why women feel certain men are creepy. One side of being creepy is a man who is an absolute perv and has no social regard. That is not the side I speak of. The side I speak of is the one where a guy is so unsure of how to interact with a girl because he isn’t owning his own reality. So he says weird shit, he doesn’t have any sort of strong frame (aka sure of his own shit), so women just get a strange vibe. They can’t place what it is but from an evolutionary perspective it’s a vibe of “this guy can’t protect and care for me because he has no idea what he is doing”. Women love cocksure motherfuckers. These are the guys known as “jerks”. Really this is just code word for “guy who is sure of himself so he doesn’t take shit”. If you’ve been around guys who are considered jerks you notice they share nothing in common except they are convinced of every fucking thing they say. Whether they’re wrong or not, women sense this and get the tingles.

Consider this. Say you’re really into a girl. You want to tell her you’re into her. But you’re afraid of what she’ll think. You’re afraid because rejection doesn’t feel good. But honestly why spend time around a person who doesn’t want your advances? Do you really fucking care about a friendship with a hot girl, honestly? Or do you want her?

But Fit, you say, isn’t the best way to go about this to act all cocky and funny and to bust her balls and do all that shit? Well yes and we’re not here to talk about methods, but let’s go beneath why you feel bad about being rejected. Because if you’re rejected, something is wrong with you.

But by you not taking action, you already rejected yourself. Call me crazy but by now I want to be rejected. Because I am so done with wasting my fucking time with people that there is simply no reason I need to waste my short life away pining over someone who doesn’t give a shit. I would rather know now.

But let’s put this into technique. Say you really want a girl. Fuck telling her you like her. Show it. Make a move. If she pulls away you just exit the convo and go about your merry day. Yeah that shit stings and people might look. But guess what. Nobody fucking cares except you. Isn’t that freeing?

So the next time you want to make a decision, just own your decision. If you can’t own not making a move in any aspect of life then guess what? You have to make the move. I would rather live with myself knowing I tried too hard than not tried at all. After all life rewards action and not passive bullshit. If you can’t own your decision then you damn sure better not to do it because THAT will eat at you harder.

Your duty in life is to lead

This past weekend was a monumental lesson for me in the reason for men’s existence. I don’t mean in the philosophical meaning of life type way but more so in us recognizing our role to actually TAKE HOLD of what it means to be male.

This past weekend I had a first date with some broad from the burbs. It didn’t go well in the success story of a bang but what it did is it taught me a lesson that I have been wary to learn for a very long time.

So I had been invited to a 10 year High School Reunion. You know, those places where you have to prove how awesome you’ve become over the loser/awesome person they already knew. Anyway, feeling honored I had the chance to be someone’s eye candy, I agreed.

I show up. It’s a sports bar. We chat for like 30 minutes. Her classmates start showing up. She is weak in introducing me so I have to do it myself. Before you know it I was working the room, all the girls loved me and all the guys acknowledged my awesomeness. If this was my High School reunion I am thinking the reception might have been slightly different.

As time goes on and she sees her classmate approval of me being VERY high (as she notices all the women there taking very well to me), escalation with her (kissing, making out, all the good stuff) is super easy. I pull her in to kiss in front of everyone. She digs it. Things are great.

About halfway through the date she tells me she isn’t trying to be exclusive. No biggie I figure. I sure the fuck ain’t so good for us to get this out of the way soon enough. However a few minutes later as she gets away from me I see her hitting up this guy from her old HS. After a time she steps out (I only find out about this later as I walk out to look for her) and she is there. Chatting him up. Whatever I thought. Dumb broad isn’t worth it and she just dissed me this way. I told her I was leaving. She said OK. I kiss her goodbye in front of him and walk to my car.

Wait.

I said fuck this. See too many times I have been dissed on a first date and it has gone to shit. I never said anything. I just chalked it to there’s something wrong with me so on to the next one. Not this fucking time.

I go back to the both of them talking. I say to him “hey can I borrow her for a minute?”. He says “sure no problem! I wasn’t even trying to do anything. I am so sorry. This was nothing”. Very apologetic. Very gentleman like. I knew I liked her High School classmates.

I pull her off to the side (this is by the entrance). I want to make sure people see us. I calmly tell her where and when she went wrong. I make sure to explain that this is unacceptable behavior on a first date. She looks down and apologizes. At this point I tell her “I don’t give a fuck what you do but you will NOT disrespect me. Am I clear?” She replies “yes. It won’t happen again. Will you text me tomorrow?” I don’t answer. I leave and pay my tab.

Will I text her again and try something? I don’t know nor do I care. At this point this story wasn’t about doing anything in particular with her or what the outcome of the first date was. At this point I went in my car and started to debrief myself on what women need.

Truth is, men, women need us to tell them what to do. They don’t have guidance in their life. Women’s shit tests are preparation for raising our daughters. If we can’t handle women’s shit tests now then our daughters (and sons) will grow defiant and become criminals who run around thinking shit doesn’t have consequences in life. Truth be told after this display I should have just humiliated her in public and called it a day. What I do know is I give zero fucks where this girl goes in life and it’s all a revolving door. But another thing I know is that having to assert oneself as the boss in front of an unruly bitch is not only routine, but we as men have to welcome it.

That’s right. Whenever someone gives you a shit test, whenever someone disrespects you, you need to call them out on it. You’re not doing this to prove yourself necessarily as you’re doing this because the world lets evil get away with itself time and time again and I can understand why. Men let bad people be themselves. In the case of women we shy away from telling them when they’re wrong.

Don’t be afraid to tell a woman she’s wrong. But also, don’t get mad when you do it. Being mad at a woman is a sure way to give her power over you. Instead let them know how disappointed you are and how much it makes them look like shit. Basically, talk down to them as if you were their father. Honestly this is part of the whole having a girl see you as “daddy”. These weak creatures have no guidance and need it. Now it’s up to you to decide whether you want to give the guidance or not but know this: not giving guidance to a woman you’re involved with will put you in a world of hurt.

In this life we must take the reins and realize this is our job. In the event we choose not to do this, life will punish us rightly.

As for High School reunion girl we probably won’t cross paths again. That night was more for me to do something I had never done before, and that’s call a bitch out on her shit immediately. Let this be only the beginning of more of this to come. I will go forward welcoming shit tests and enjoy beating them down. After all, that’s why we are here.

Nice to meet you

Let’s talk about how I have no need to sell you anything. I am a guy who grew up in relative comfort with everything I needed. I don’t have some sob story about poverty or how I pulled myself up from my bootstraps. This isn’t that kind of blog. I don’t have secrets to share or any of that nonsense. I have stories to tell. I want you to know me for me.

My hardships (if you can call them that) happened upon puberty. I was so awkward with women. I was a 5’2 brown skinned kid in high school. I had no idea how to flirt. I once took a girl waving at me so seriously I developed a crush on her and ended up writing some inappropriate love notes that got me kicked out of school. All in freshman year.

We can talk about how I had such a heavy crush on this one Black chick who gave me so many chances to woo her (to the point we even rode the bus home together) and I still didn’t make a move. Talk about being a pussy. Or how when I was in college I barely had the courage to talk to women in my own classes. Or how I finally got my first kiss at 23 (the one at 20 didn’t count as she turned her cheek and we didn’t lock lips). Or how when I first had sex with my first “lover” at 23 I had to lie and say I wasn’t a virgin. Or maybe how this one Christian chick whom I saw for 2 whole dates had me obsessed for a year.

See I was the epitome of a beta male. Or gamma or whatever. Perpetually afraid to make moves, always afraid of confrontation, and just all around a man child. No wonder women were repelled by me. I had good intentions of being a strong male for them and all they could find in me were faults.

Anyway, I want to tell you stories of myself. I want this blog to show you that I am a man like you. I have no idea what the fuck I am doing and learning as I go. I am not like those swindlers who claim they arrived to their destination of hotties and now can take you on your way there. Nope. I do have good stories though. Like when I fucked a girl for almost 4 hours straight on our 2nd date. Or how I choked and slapped a woman into orgasm and had her begging me for more. Or how I got a woman so obsessed and to chase and stalk me so hard (without having sex with her!!) that she managed to find my workplace and my own boss had to lie for me to cover my ass (okay that wasn’t actually a good story). I have those good stories, too. I have painful and pathetic stories of walking through suburban streets crying for a woman to look at me, to stories of Siffredi like sex where a woman basically became my sex slave and would do anything for me sexually. You get it all here.

You’ll get to know about my long distance online relationships that went nowhere. You will get to know about a girl going down on me the first date while in my car parked on a main busy street while I hoped the cops wouldn’t pull us over. You will get to know how women would yell at me in public and humiliate me. You will get to know how I fingered an 18 year old girl outside of a Chipotle where the cops were grabbing lunch. You get pathetic me and triumphant me all here. You will hear how a cute blonde in college told me I wasn’t a real man (hell you will read how MANY people told me that). You will read about my 2nd date with a hot redhead who I boned in a closet while her friend napped in another room. You get the point.

Come along with me on this journey and get to know me. Hopefully you get something out of it. I know that I had moments where I would pray to God that I would leave this Earth knowing I did the right thing. My stories are here to inspire you men to do the same. I have spent much of my life wondering how I can serve other people. I feel like I was put on this Earth to guide my fellow man. I hope you get a lot out of this and that we can learn together and grow as brothers on this journey called life.

L’chaim or whatever the fuck that phrase is.